Last night I was reminded that I’m someone who does. While I have a deep need to bring value to people’s lives around me … to cheer them up … to make their days brighter. My best work is when I can do something tangible.
In the 10th grade I was in Honors math. I was always two steps ahead of my class. I liked staying after school and talking to my teacher about the next chapter. I was always bored with the chapter we were on and the next chapter seemed more fascinating.
My friend on the other hand struggled with math, lit class – even history – she excelled well above me. But I had math on lock down. I remember one week where she had a test and she asked me to help her study but I failed miserably trying to explain it in a way that she could grasp. I felt like I had only made things worse when I left her house that night.
The next day she stayed after to get help from her teacher but chatting over AIM that evening I knew she was feeling hopeless.
I couldn’t shake the feeling that I still needed to help. I needed to do something. My friend was upset and feeling lost.
While the cookies were in the oven I scoured the bible for something that might resonate. That her intelligence was from God. I can’t remember the verses I picked but I found a handful I thought fit the situation.
I wrote out a letter to her. Encouraging her. Reminding her that this was simply one math test and she had all these amazing qualities.
After choir I told her I’d meet her at her locker so wait for me. I brought her a box of cookies and the note. She was thankful for the encouragement and went into her test feeling like she could pass it.
We met up at lunch and she told me how well she thought she did. She walked in with an optimistic out look and just tried to keep her head up the whole time.
I struggle when I know someone is upset, hurt, lonely and there isn’t a damn thing I can do. But, I’ve put myself into a situation though where a good number of my friends are online. It’s hard to show up at a new mom’s door with a lasagna when she lives a few states away. It rather impossible to leave sticky notes under windshield wipers of a friend who need encouragement but lives in another country.
So I’ve been fighting internally. Actually thinking I could make do with just online friends. I can’t. I need to be here focusing on making friends with people in my neighborhood. It’s a challenging to make friends locally with trad-con or red pill views. A challenge that has me stalling and a little scared.
Time to face it – This energy has got to go somewhere. I’ve texted a few local friends this morning. Yoga with one friend, coffee with another. Hiding behind a computer leaves this little extrovert alone too much.
Oh, she passed her math test.
Until next time,
Follow me on twitter IrisAndOleander, and don’t forget to subscribe if you like what you read.
Cover photo credit jamieanne