Stop picking and choosing what days you will honor your husband!
This is going to be a quickly written mini-rant because of something I saw on facebook in a religious homemaking group.
Personally, I love stuff like this – I think it’s fun and silly. But I don’t abide by anything like this to the letter. If I did – I’d probably drive myself nuts. (But the GOAL is fucking spot on.)
The thing that I saw in this homemaker group though was rude women. Women saying “Well, where is his list?” Women saying “But what has Husband done for me lately?!” Women saying “Why should we bend over backward for our guy when he doesn’t for us?”
No, really, you women sound selfish.
Here is the thing – you vowed at your wedding to honor, love, respect, your husband, always. You didn’t say “I’ll honor you on Mondays, I’ll love you on sunny days, and I’ll respect you on days you bring me flowers.” No, you said you’d love him all days.
Through the good days, the bad days, the healthy days, the sick days, the prosperous days, and the “how the to eff are we paying for a new roof this month???” days. THAT is what you vowed.
And yes so did he
BUT YOU CAN’T MAKE HIM
Stop holding your love for him hostage to his love for you. Stop holding the respect you have him in and only showing it on days you feel like he’s showing you respect.
Instead, I challenge you to show him love every day. Show him respect even when you’re tired and cranky. And honor the family you are creating with him.
Because you married him. Because you said you would. Because you vowed those things in front of friends and family.
“BUT IRIS…. WHAT IF HE DOESNT SHOW HIS LOVE!?”
- Did you marry a jack ass? (I’mma guess no)
- Are you projecting your feelings and how you show love onto him and then getting mad when he doesn’t share your feelings (I’mma guess yes)
When you start keeping score you’re doomed to fail. He will have bad days, he will forget things on his to-do list, he will reprioritize something and not tell you. But give him grace. Give him all the love you have.
Because you said you would.
Until next time,
Follow me on twitter IrisAndOleander, and don’t forget to subscribe if you like what you read.